A guide to American politics

The announcement was made that Justice Kennedy would be retiring. This led to jovial comments on social media that we should use Mitch McConnell’s logic and postpone filling the vacant seat until after the next presidential election, thus preserving the will of the American people.
For those who have not been paying attention, I offer this handy synopsis for understanding American politics:

A Supreme Court justice shall only be appointed by a sitting Republican president, thus being the will of the people. A Democratic president doing so is twisting the Constitution for the liberal agenda.
Speaking of the Constitution, that document–and its sister document, The Holy Bible- may be cherry-picked, when and where convenient, to justify the oppression or silencing of another. On a side note, actually reading and demonstrating comprehension of these documents is not required when engaging in policymaking or discussions thereof. Taking items out of context is especially useful in social media trolling.
Which takes us to the following related sociopolitical situations:
Businesses may not refuse services unless it is a conservative business discriminating against a liberal customer; people may not gather in public places or operate neighborhood sales unless they are white, otherwise it is a violent protest engaging in a mob mentality; it is not kidnapping if the child is of foreign origin; bombing a school or public place is an act of organized terrorism when Arabic, unless the perpetrator is white, in which case it is a mentally-disturbed individual in need of help; burning an effigy of an elected official is not hate speech unless it disrespects a Republican; a white citizen is guilty until proven innocent in the eyes of the law but a black citizen is considered armed and dangerous for carrying a bag a Skittles after dark; burning the United States flag is an act of tasteless disrespect but waving the flag of the states which went to war with the United States in the very definition of an act of sedition and treason is considered the utmost display of patriotism; reporting the facts is fake news and questioning political propaganda is censorship; moving to a new land is a crime if you are from Central or South America, but taking a land by violent force is manifest destiny if you are from Europe or North America; the natural world is ablaze as famine, war, and genocide fueled by ignorance and fear scar the beauty of life, the only protection from which being this protective eyewear.

Come. See the world through the lens of the privileged and sleep soundly at night. If the cries of the innocent are keeping you awake we have earplugs, too.

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